When did having more than one child become a social stigma? I know, the whole ideal happy family Disneyland pass family of 4 is much more convenient to buy frozen dinners with, and find economy friendly cars to fit. But the 'one of each' idea isn't what all families feel fits them best. And I know several friends who have more children than I do, so I always think of you gals when strangers say to me "Boy, you have your hands full" when I go in public with my 3 kids.
I just say "Literally I do, that's a good observation." Okay, I say that in my head. Most of the time. (It has slipped out a few times.)
But yes, 3 kids keep me busy. 3 different individuals, personalities, spiritual/emotional/physical needs that need to be met, and usually 90% of it is done by myself. But I think I handle it with better grace than what it feels like on those days when those comments fly my way.
Why does a stranger need to say I have my hands full? Usually all are behaving, clean, following safety boundaries while in public, using manners, etc. Do I have that "about to flip the crazy switch" look on my face? NO? Then why the comment?
Because most days, I feel like my cup is full, and not my hands.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Feeling full
Posted by April at 1:43 PM
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3 comments:
oh, and i love it when they audibly count my children, like 4 is hard to get to! you take 2, multiply by 12, divide by 6? take a mental picture and count when you get to your car. i totally get it that my job doesn't always look like a party, but seriously, i'm having fun. if they knew only half of the rewards entangled in that good night hug and kiss, they'd be having kids like it was their job, too! :) actually, if they have comments like that, maybe they shouldn't have kids. we don't need more people like them. hahhaa i'm so mean!
I am so guilty of making comments like that to parents. It isn't because I think their kids are ill mannered or appear not taken care of, it's because some days it's all I can do to take care of one child so for me to imagine having two or three or more, oye! :)
Mine is more of a "hats off to you sister, I don't know if I could do it" comment. But you can usually tell by the way the person says it whether or not they are meaning it as a critique or back woods compliment!
However I do know some people with two or more children who never venture outside of the house with them because it is more than they can handle. My comment would take on a much different meaning in that case!
I will be more aware before I make comments in the future! ;)
I like the thing that says, "If you think my hands are full, you should see my heart." I once had a woman go, "Are these all YOURS?" I was like, really? It's not like I'm Michelle Duggar.
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