It's my blog so I'll cry if I want to.
I'm so tired of being stuck in my house. But it's the reasons that I'm the most tired of. I'm tired of my little Kellan being sick with one thing after another- his immune system needs to get back to full strength, so if you have the slightest sniffle, keep it to yourself please! Stupid salmonella. Stupid time of year.
Bring on spring.
I have so much in my life that shows me that my Heavenly Father hears my prayers, and that through all the growing experiences that I need to go through, he's going to throw some cushion in there for me. But I keep going back to the scripture in Phillipians 4.
Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.
I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
I believe that. With God, nothing shall be impossible. I can do ALL THINGS. But it's overwhelming to truly feel like you've been given everything to handle. Just because we can do all things, doesn't mean we should.
I know my life could be worse. I hope no one reads this and says "Waaah, try dealing with what I've got going on, yours should be easy." I"m just in a difficult funk. I miss feeling like I've planned this life, and welcomed these trials with someone meeting those steps with me. And Tiffany, you're right. I've been through a LOT in the last 5 months. I just need a mental rest. I need to find that place of being content again, even with the trials. I'm not a private person so this is a big unloading- sorry! I just need a nap most of all, lol.
4 comments:
I so would offer my services...but Cora's runny nose is back, and she has a hacking cough, diarrhea and puffy eyes...yes I know they're the symptoms of everything...it's just unnerving. I don't want your sicky sickies either.
Anyway, take a nap and then call me. Love ya!
Just because you can handle everything doesn't mean you should. You are absolutely right. That is where your friends and ward family steps in. That is where we say, enough is enough. We are going to take care of you so you can take care of your little boy. We are there, every moment, every minute, every day to help you with what you might need help with. I love you sweets, you are doing amazing!
I don't know Tiffanyrose, but she nailed it! Good job Tif :)
I know how you feel April, I think to some extent - we all go through a funk at some point in our life, and for some of us...we have to hit that funk a few times (I'm referring to me here).
I think it's the Lord's way of helping us remember what this life is about - and how strong we will be in the end. Call your ward family. If they refuse to help you, then they'll go to hell, and you will be exhaulted above them :)
Hang in there sis, if I could come and help, I hope you know that I would!! Tell Kellan to get better so he can come and visit us again!
I'm sorry you're there right now. The whole "endure to the end" thing sometimes makes me feel overwhelmed and even more stuck in the tough moment at hand. My dear friend Megan once counseled me to just endure the middle. Peace seemed a lot closer that way. The fact that you recognize you've had moment of contentment, though not right now, is indication enough that you will once again get there. I like to think the Lord blesses us with "divine discontentment" so that we strive harder to better ourselves and the world around us. Hang in there.
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